Choking on Popcorn!

I love movies. I think it's something we all should get involved with in order to escape from this harsh reality. (gituu..). Movies are fantasies that we can all afford to have and it doesn't hurt to feel like you're Juliet or rich and effing famous.

The say we should appreciate local movies. Support our local actresses and actors and also directors and screenplay writers because supporting your local artists is just the right thing to do, show em some lurve, give the country some revenue and all that jazz. But what I cannot handle is, the limit of creativity that these so-called artistes have. A few examples might help you agree with me.

1. Seeing double. After watching certain malay movies, have you ever felt a sense of Deja Vu? Yea, tell me about it. What's with all the remakes? As if YOU can make it more interesting.
*Tokyo Drift - KL Drift
*The Fast and The Furious - KL Menjerit/ Remp-it ( only promoting the fact that we love our Rempits)
* Love Actually - Cinta
* Daredevil/Spiderman - Cicakman ( I think they're suits look alike)
* Splash - Duyung
* NYPD Blue - Gerak Khas (ni paling takleh blah)
The list can go on...

2. The Dialogue. I cannot handle the schematic and stiff dialoques in Malay movies/series. It just reflects a fake, uptight and emotionless society, which we are certainly not!
A: Mari kita pergi makan? (wei, gi makan jom!)
B: Nak makan kat mana? (Katne?)
or
Father: Ali, pergi tidur, sudah lewat malam ni, esok sekolah. (Ali, tido gi. 2mrw school)
Son: Baiklah Ayah, Ali tidur dulu ya. (K, Ayah)
Father: Jangan lupa gosok gigi dan cuci kaki ye..(Gosok gigi tu, cuci kaki skali)
Son: Baik Yah..(Oritee..)

Get the point? If you still don't, i recommend you watch an episode of Gerak Khas, you'll get the picture.

3. The Plot. Its always about groups of screwed up teenagers getting high, being prostitutes, going clubbing, racing their Super cars/bikes, disappointing their parents and in the end someone dies/gets shot/gets into an accident/gets caught by the police and they learn their lesson, or so it seems. Newsflash! No one is learning anything from these movies. If anything, teenagers just think it's cool to race and go rempit-ing/ take drugs because they're favourite actors are doing it.

Or, some Datuk is having an affair with some secretary and then people want to take over his multi-gazillion company, and they just happen to have photos of him with the girl he's having an affair with, and they try to blackmail him. When that doesn't work (because the Datuk hired some guys to destroy the pictures) they kidnap the Datuk's wife/daughter/sister (has to be a girl, because a damsel in distress is oh-so-sexy.)
It always ends with someone dying. D'uh someone has to die so they can write this in the credits: "Cerita ini adalah rekaan semata2, tiada kaitan dengan yang hidup atau mati".

4. Over-the-top makeup and wardrobe. I cannot handle the fact that the actresses wear a ton of makeup and wear ridiculous clothes and wear WIGS! I mean, it's okay to wear wigs, but a diff hairstyle every damn day? Obviously too tacky and soooo deadly un-creative. Would you wanna admire someone who wears purple eye shadow with devil red lipstick, who also wears a polka-doted green dress while wearing a wig that doesn't suit her at all. I know acting is supposed to be one step above the layman, but this is just plain dumb.


Seriously, we need a revamp of Malaysia's movie scene. We need to get creative and think of ways to be different. Make Malaysians want/can't wait/won't regret to spend that RM10/12 on that cinema ticket. I'm definitely NOT saying that all Malaysian-made movies suck. But i really do think we can do with some improvement.
If Kabir Bhatia can come up with the amazing "Sepi" and Yasmin Ahmad can come up with "Sepet" and "Gubra" etc..(let's not forget her killer commercials, love em!)
I'm very sure more Malaysians can do the same thing, or even better.

Think about it, why waste millions to create a movie which no one would remember for years to come? The real success is to create a story that would be talked about for years to come because of the difference it made, or because you simply just fell in love with it.

Bang!

Sorry for the sudden pause people! I had a week-long affair in Shah Alam. It was messy.

Anyways, now I'm back in beautiful SP. Enjoying my holidays with the family. Ah...i miss the lazy life!

So, keep your front doors locked and keep track of your boyfriends, Stephanie Morris has returned!

Come on people! Get lazy, stay up late and sleep in with me! well, not with me.
I don't share my bed, unless you want me to!
:P

xoxo,
S.M.

What's with the 3rd Degree?

Peraturan:
1-Peraturan ditulis di awal Tag.

2-Setiap pemain menjawap jawapan peribadi mereka.

3-Akhir sekali,tag 5 orang dan pos nama mereka,pergi ke laman blog mereka dan tinggalkan komen yang memberitahu mereka sudah di'tag' dan ajak mereka bermain dan baca blog anda.

Apa yang kamu lakukan sekitar jam 10.17 semalam?
- Tunggu bus in Shah Alam nak pulang ke kampung halaman, Sp ku yang indah!

Selain itu,apa yang kamu lakukan sekarang?
- D'uh, buat tag!

Adakah kamu akan bangun 7.00 pagi esok?
- Hell no.

Who's the funniest person you know?
- Evryone I know is funny, i cannot handle ppl with a retarded sense of humour.

Are you afraid to grow up?
- Not really, why fear the inevitable?

What was your worst subject in school?
-Add. Maths. The bane of my existence.

Kalau anda minum 14 mug bir,apa yang akan terjadi?
- Soalan yang patut ditanya kalau saya minum 14 mug bir, wht's gonna happen to the ppl who are with/around me?

Tidur dengan pintu terbuka atau tertutup?
- Tertutup, sumtimes bukak sket...malas nak tutup. heh.

Bila kali terakhir kamu buat perkara yang kamu rasa salah?
- I do something wrong every damn day.

Apa yang sedang kamu pakai sekarang?
- Boxers and baju tido

What are you listening to right now?
- The humming of my pc and the fan.

Whats your favorite number?
- 5. (sumpah i tak tiru you ismal!)

How is the weather right now?
- Dark, cold. Malam namenye.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
- Hafeez

Merokok?
- yup. Pall Mall Menthols

Eye Color?
- Dark Brown.

Bulan kesukaan?
- bulan purnama. gitu..

Apakah movie terbaru yang kamu tonton?
- OMG. The qualms of being single, you don't go to the movies that often. damn.

Hari kesukaan?
- Hari cuti.

Jika kamu boleh cakap sesuatu pada seseorang,apa yang kamu akan cakap?
- Seriously, wht's your point?

Pelukan atau ciuman?
- What's one without the other?

Berkawan lagi dengan rakan-rakan di sekolah lama?
- Of cross!

Left-handed atau right-handed?
- I do it better with my right hand. (seriously, why does everything have a sexual conotation?)

Mahu tidur dengan berapa bantal?
- I need at least three. two for my head, one to peluk!

Tidur dengan seseorang atau bersendirian?
-depends on my mood.

Apa yang kejutkan kau pagi tadi?
- The sun.

Boleh teruskan hidup dengan tidak merokok?
-Why not?

Pernah kawan baik kamu buat onar di belakang kamu?
- Depan, belakang, kiri dan kanan, baby!

Memilih untuk memberi nombor telefon?
- Sometimes.

Mana lebih suka: McDonalds atau Burger King
-Burger King mahal mcm nak beli emas. So i'd choose McD.

Mahu pergi ke Greece atau Hawaii?
- Greece. Nak jumpe tht guy from Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants and go skinny dipping with him. awww...

Hari jadi yang menarik tahun ini
- Mine!

Saya tag:
Bella Muerte
Ms. Yeah
Ninja
Mr. Nelayan
Bini Nelayan

Strip Search Me and Call Me Baby!

Since we're in the mood of oogling hawt men, let me introduce mine!

ohh...Adam Levine. You can strip search me and call me baby, anytime!



Hawt man, Hawt bod, Hawt stare, Hawt tattoo!
What more could a girl ask for?

Tear Me Apart. I Won't Bleed.

Been thinking of what to blog about for the past hour or so...

Then, i remembered that i haven't blogged about tattoos in a while, so i went browsing on the Internet and i found THE tattoo! i'm so in love with it! whoever did it was a freakin tattoo jedi and the person who got was beyond genius! Kudos! I love it!

These are the arms and legs, it seriously looks like spidey
is gonna pop out anytime soon!

Yes! That's a freaking tattoo and it's the whole body, mind you. It's so hot I need an ice-pack!
You have to admit, it's pretty darn BEAUTIFUL!

Isn't this chest piece just a work of art? If only, if only....

Four Words-- I. Envy. I. Want. garrrnnn....

The Truth is very Ugly.

Hmm..some of you might hate the fact that i'm about to post this, some of you might agree, some of you might totally disagree and decide to declare war against me and others might just not give a damn. so i recommend that you pick a side because there is a whole lot of hurtful truth in this post and the truth is often hard to swallow. Which makes this sooo much better! For me, obviously.

For those of you who know me, you know that I'm not the staunch-est Muslim there is out there. But, I do know a thing or two. ( I like to read if you hadn't notice and I do pay attention during Agama class). So, here come the big issue. Since when is it okay to wear a tudung and still commit deadly sins, overtly? Yes, we have all seen it, well now it's time to read all about it! During the duration of this post, sila izinkan saya berbahasa ibunda.


Isu pertama.

Pada suatu hari yang biasa, aku jalan2 kat mane tah ngan kawan2...ade la minah2 ni...aku igtkan indon...aku buat bodo je la. Pakai tudung, tapi pakai seluar 3/4, baju lengan pendek. aku fikir, "ni dah ikut mazhab mane pulak ni?". aku fikir indon, jadi aku buat tak tau, mereka ni kurang ajaran yang benar agaknya. Sekali time tgh lalu kat sebelah, cakap BM baik punya, takde pelat indon pun. Melayu kita rupanya. Ni dah kenape rambut tutup tapi kaki ngan lengan nampak? Aku yang tak cemerlang bab agama pun tau ni dah salah. Dah la salah, fashion faux pas yang teramat sgt! Sakit mata tgk doh! K la...xpe la, setelah aku dan kwn2 selesai mengutuk dan beredar dari tempat itu, aku pun dah kurang tensi sikit lah.

Isu kedua.

Korang penah kan tengok filem pornografi yang disebarkan melalui sms. Aku tau mmg byk versi, tapi versi ni sgt best. ade sorang minah bertudung, dgn selambanya blowjob boyfriend dia kat tepi tangga la, dalam kereta la, dlm toilet la, dlm store room pun ade (ber"background"kan kotak2 yang byk sgt, buruk betul). ade juga yang main raba2 kat public! haih. ni dah takleh jadi. kok ye pun nak record aktiviti anda yang sgt tak mengiurkan itu, (jgn sesekali perasan porn anda setaraf ngan minah salleh stock jenna jameson) BUKAKLA TUDUNG TU! aku bukan nak cakap, tapi mmg kene cakap! apesal laaa yang BODO sgt?!?! buruk tau tak bila dah terpampang kat semua org korang buat keje tu dengan tudung plak tu! alahmak aih.... adik2, kakak2, tolong la pakai akal sikit dah fikir.

Isu ketiga.

Ade jugak yang pakai tudung alasanya "mak bapak suruh pakai"...o0o0...mak bapak kau suruh buat maksiat sambil pakai tudung gak ke? Bapak kau suruh pakai tudung sebab dia tak nak tanggung dosa kau sebagai anak dia. Yang kau tambah dengan maksiat kot atas tu sape suruh? kan dah bodoh namenye?
Bila korang tgk org mcm aku ni, pakai takde la sopan sgt, tak pakai tudung plak tu, korang judge (bukan semua ye), korang ckp "ee, tak tutup aurat". OK, aku setuju. But at least, aku takde la isap kote mamat mane tah, pastu kasi dia record, pastu buleh tgk camera pulak tu! mcm soo proud dapat jadi pornstar yang "alim". Korang tak hot dan korang tidak penah akan hot selagi tidak berfikir dengan waras.
Pastu pegi dating ngan boyfriend nak pegang2 tangan, nak peluk2 kat shopping mall. Haih! Malu doh! Baik kau bukak je tudung tu, tinggal kat umah, takpun simpan dalam bag. Nanti Bapak marah pulak, keluar tadi pakai tudung, balik dah hilang dah. isk isk (Pegang tangan boyfriend, peluk2, cium2 --bapak tak marah ke? :P)


Konklusi.

Sememangnya pakai tudung itu satu bende yang wajib di kalangan wanita Islam. Kita dimuliakan oleh Allah kerana ikut perintahNya dan menutup aurat. TAPI, bile dah start buat bende2 tak senonoh ni, dah defeats the purpose. Memang la dah xde pahala dah kan? dah, aku dah tak tau nak cakap mcm mane. What are your thoughts? I know i'm not the expert so maybe there are people who think otherwise or have other opinions.

Please do share!


The Bane of your Existence,
xoxo,
S.M



P/S: I'm just sharing, and not pointing this to any particular person/group. Kalau terasa, and nak marah aku, aku silakan. TAPI aku nak tanye dulu, Kenape nak terasa? Kau ade buat salah ke? Don't blame me kalau dah tergigit cili dan terasa pedasnya. I told you, the truth is often hard to swallow.

Une nuit a Paris!

Demain est mon examen de francaise. Je suis endormie, je ne veux pas d'etudier. Je suis tres confiant... que je suis baise!

Peu importe, avoir une bonne nuit.

Merci beaucoup a tous mes lecteurs pour traduire cette.

Food for Thought 04

What's the masculine word for slut?

Why is there only a "slutty" word for a woman?

Why isn't there one for a man?

Hmm...

Let's Talk about Sex, baby!

I know, i'm soo not supposed to talk about this! o0o0o0...what a scary/ embarrassing/ degrading/humiliating/no-no topic! Well, i'm talking about it because you're not. So, here are my thoughts on the holy grail of emotions. The epitome of relationships and the death of conservative-ness. Consider this your elbow pads and helmet before plunging into the insatiable world of sex. I don't claim to have any sort of credentials, but I am living and experiencing life. So, don't take my word for it..this is just something we can read about together and maybe learn a thing or two in the process.

Today's topic - Virginity.

I think this topic goes out to the ladies. Okay, so you're thinking about having sex for the first time and not quite sure what it's gonna be like. You've heard stories here and there like, it's gonna hurt or you're gonna bleed or you're gonna be "loose" after losing your virginity. I can assure you, it's not as bad as it sounds.

1. I seriously don't think that your virginity is something you can "lose". Therefore, i do not agree with the term "i lost my virginity". You're virginity is yours and it is not something that can be taken away or lost or stolen. Its yours for as long as you want it to be.

2. The bleeding is caused by a tear in your hymen ( a thin layer of skin surrounding the opening of the vagina). Absolutely scientific, and has nothing to do with losing your self-esteem in the process. And one can't be "loose" when you start having sex. This is a common misunderstanding. This doesn't happen until you're like 50, no matter how many times you've had sex. When you're older, the muscles around the vagina lose their "tough" ness and durability, usually comes with childbirth and aging of the body.

3. Let's say you've had sex for the first time, For God's Sake, THAT MAN DOES NOT OWN YOU! If you're smart/stupid enough to have sex with a man you're not married to, then you're smart enough to deal with the consequences should something go wrong with the relationship. Do not subject yourself to being a slave for this man should he decide to break it off, or you find out he's having an affair or some shit like that. DEAL WITH IT! You have to stand up for yourself and move on. Be strong.

4. Don't you dare, even for a second, think that you're not worth it anymore after you've had sex for the first time. This is the 21st century. Chill. Like I said, if you're smart enough to have sex before marriage, then be double smart in dealing with the consequences.

5. And please, think about it over and over again. Don't have sex because all your friends are having sex, and don't start having sex because the tv shows are saying it's oh so cool. Do it because YOU wanna do it. And do it when YOU'RE ready to do it. not when HE'S ready or when you think you love the guy so much that you're gonna die from all the love. Truth is, he might not love you just as much.

Okay people, that's all i have for you now, I'll get back to you with more juicy, sexy details. Don't be shy, post your questions in the comment section. I will get back to you..

Safe sex always!
xoxo,
S.M

Tagged by Aimi!

Ok, so, sorta got tagged by Aimi...so now i have to write 7 cool/weird/bizzarro things about me... I hope ur ready, bitches!

1. I have this thing, when people talk about something and I'm eavesdropping, I won't keep quiet like other people do, I jump in and start asking "ape, weh?". (a bit kampung, but wht the hell, there's a "timah" in all of us)

2. I'm a sneeze-a-holic. If i feel like I'm about to sneeze, i don't keep it in, instead i force it out...drives my friends crazy.

3. I love NOSE shoes. they drive me crazy like up the wall crazy. it doesn't matter if they are on sale or just plain expensivo, if i have the dough, i'd by them. nothing beats the fresh smell of a new NOSE recyclable box with a pair of to die for high-heeled goodies just waiting for me to go dancing in them. but, in contrast, i hate walking around in shopping malls for hours without a specific purpose. i guess i'm a man in that sense.

4. I hate it when someone lies, then i find out the truth, in a horrible way or from someone else. if you're gonna lie, lie intelligently. perfect the art and make sure it's full proof. if you don't you're just making yourself look dumber than you already are. please.

5. I think I sound really good when i sing and look really hot when i dance. i really do.

6. I cannot seem to bring myself to fall for a guy who's my age or younger than me. i tried, failed miserably. Simply because i think that men actually act and think two years younger than their age. So, i go for older men. Not old, just old-er. get it?

7. I can be a real bitch and a half and a pain in ur ass and you would never see it coming. ever.